Roommate rivalry

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Lyrics
Intro (The song starts as a ballad)

Mordecai and Rigby:

Our life is so domfusing,

There is No reason and there is no rhyme.

We've got this funny feeling,

Getting old before our time.

(music changes to a hip-hop beat)

Gimme whachu got!

Gimme whachu got!

I know whachu got!

Gimme whachu got!

Rigby:

What kind of friendship brings such confusion, mordo?

Mordecai:

Shuts out the sun and kills all glee?

Mordecai and Rigby:

What are these dues we're here to tell you?

Mordecai, Rigby, and backing vocals:

It's roommate rivalry!

I don't wanna share!

I wanna make you nuts!

Gimme whachu got!

Gotta have it all!

Rigby:

Sometimes I see him doing work.

Mordecai:

I'm working hard all by myself.

And who can stand a happy pal?

Rigby:

He hates I don't require help!

Backing vocals:

Ooh, ooh, ooh!

Mordecai:

I put a spider on his shoulder.

Backing vocals:

Oh, yeah! Ooh-ooh!

Rigby:

I'm not aware that it was fake.

Backing vocals:

Ooh, ooh, ooh!

Mordecai:

I ask him what the heck that thing is.

Backing vocals:

Ew!

Rigby:

I turn and start I scream and shake!

Backing vocals:

Scream and shake!

(music changes from hip-hop to shuffle)

Mordecai:

Whyyyyyyy should it feel so good, my dear old funny friend?

I know it's wrong to feel so mean,

You...you should've hear him scream!

(Mordecai laughs)

(The song changes back from shuffle to hip-hop)

Rigby:

I am not blameless in this question.

Mordecai:

He likes to talk over my head.

Rigby:

Poor Mordo, his trials and tribulations.

Backing vocals:

Poor Mordo.

Mordecai:

Before a meeting, he makes me red.

Backing vocals:

Ooh, ooh, ooh!

Rigby:

'Cause I predict that he will bail.

Backing vocals:

Gonna flunk, ooh-ooh!

Mordecai:

I chase him down when he's right.

Backing vocals:

Ooh, ooh, ooh!

Rigby:

When I refuse to just turn tail.

Don:

Hold your ground, Rigbone.

Mordecai and Rigby:

We have our most outstanding punchies!

Backing vocals:

OUTSTANDING PUNCHIES!

(The song returns to the opening ballad tempo and feel)

Rigby:

What kind of friendship brings such contusions?

Mordecai:

All these Rand-Aids the world can see?

Mordecai and Rigby:

What is the shame we're here to tell you?

Mordecai, Rigby, and backing vocals:

It's roommate rivalry!

Mordecai and Rigby:

A jay and a raccoon.

We are trying not to boast.

But we can't help believing

That we'll always be this close.

Backing vocals:

Roommates find it, oh, so hard

When it comes to giving

If they once tried singing background for a living!

(snythesizer chord to mark the end of the music)

Mordecai and Rigby (a capella):

A jay and a raccoon,

We will always be this close.

Mordecai (spoken):

Let go of my hand, Rigby.